Ten Worst: Summer acquisitions
September 14, 2011

Did you know that the MLS trading deadline is tomorrow? Sounds exciting, isn't it? Or... not, considering Metro's last late-season trade got them the trophy of Mehdi Ballouchy. Last year, we compiled a list of ten best summer acquisitions, so now let's look at the flip side of the coin. And, believe it or not, Ballouchy is not even close to making it. Yes, it's been THAT bad.

  • 10) Ryan Suarez, 2005
    Suarez was called by Alexi Lalas "the best part of Chivas USA"... a terrible expansion that that just cut the defender. He ended up playing only two games for Metro, starting two... one of those starts coming as the same terrible Chivas unloaded on the Metro defense, scoring three (Metro did come back to force a miraculous tie).

  • 9) Markus Schopp, 2006
    When Red Bull bought the MetroStars, everyone thought that the Austrians will send over a quality player or two our way. What we got was Markus Schopp, who wasn't good enough for Red Bull Salzburg... and wasn't good enough for Red Bull New York, languishing in despair. Seven games in 2006, five terrible ones in 2007, and a supposed million-dollar-plus salary to boot.

  • 8) Santino Quaranta, 2007
    Acquired from Los Angeles for a draft pick, Quaranta spent most of his Metro career either being injured or driving down to Baltimore for a cocaine fix. Enough said.

  • 7) Walter Garcia, 2009
    When he was signed, Jeff Agoos said that the team "will use the remainder of the season to evaluate him". Garcia, who was an Argentine youth international, wasn't good enough for one of the worst teams in league history, appearing only in the season's last game as a sub. So much for the evaluation.

  • 6) Gilmar, 2001
    Famously signed by Nick Sakiewicz after a run-in in an airport, Gilmar was red carded two times in 395 minutes for Metro. But, according to Sakiewicz, he was supposed to partner well with Rodrigo Faria because both were Brazilians. Nice concept, no?

  • 5) Branco, 1997
    One can say that Branco doesn't belong on this list because he actually scored a couple of goals in his 13 games with Metro. Or one can say that he belongs much higher because he received three red cards, including one for spitting on Mike Lapper that led to Metro losing a must-win game and missing out on the playoffs.

  • 4) Juan Pietravallo, 2008
    Oh, "Hard Man"... But here's the thing: he actually had one decent game, helping to shut down DC in a 0:0 draw at RFK. From then on, Pietravallo became a walking disaster, a red card waiting to happen. Even when his appearances were reduced to off the bench, his arrival meant impending doom. Unfortunately, the impotent brain trust of Agoos and Juan Carlos Osorio gave "Hard Man" a two-year guaranteed deal, meaning Metro was stuck with him -- and his salary -- for 2009.

  • 3) Daniel Garipe, 2005
    At least the players listed above appeared in the match. Garipe was so terrible he never saw the field, although he did earn a red card in a reserve game. "We feel 'The Ripper' can provide some bite and stability in our midfield," Lalas said at the time of the signing. "He's a no-nonsense player who's shown he has no problem getting down and dirty for the cause." Dirty for the cause indeed.

  • 2) Gabriel Cichero, 2008
    The Venezuelan defender supposedly thought that MLS was beneath him. When he was on the field, he was beneath MLS. In one two-game span, he was responsible for three goals allowed in each match. Benched after that, the genius of Osorio decided to bring him on for a regular-season-ending game in Chicago... where Cichero fails again, and the team with him.

  • 1) Leo Krupnik, 2009
    Krupnik can actually make the list TWICE, since he was also a late-season signing in 2002, without ever seeing any playing time. In 2009, he became a seasoned veteran of the Israeli league, and was recommended by Metro by Agoos' brother. "We think he will immediately add depth and experience to our defense," Agoos said... the only thing he added is terror. His first game, he was burned for three goals in a 4:0 loss to Colorado. He saw playing time in only two games afterwards, and will forever challenge Khano Smith for the title of worst player on one of the worst teams in league history.

    Just missing out:

  • Mohammad Khakpour, 1999
    Wasn't as terrible as many of his teammates.
  • Julian Gomez, 2000
    Too irrelevant to mention.
  • Mamadou Diallo, 2002
    His trade came in May, before the summer.
  • Andrzej Juskowiak, 2003
    Contributed to the Open Cup run.
  • Jorge Rojas, 2008
    Pietravallo and Cichero's awfulness dwarfs his... Now, his play in 2009, on the other hand...
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